Steal My Ideas, Please

Paragraphorisms: Wordy words of wisdom that take several sentences.

Epitaphorisms: Clever final words suitable for tombstones.

Laughorisms: Funny sayings. //*bant — that sorry-buzzer sound. a Google search reveals this was originally coined, same idea, by Ambrose Bierce.//
Caraforisms: Thoughts under the influence.

Stafforisms: Sayings common in workplaces.

Girafforisms: (a) Perspectives from high places, (b) sayings about animals, (c) wisdom about wildlife and/or zoos; (d) sayings that make your legs wobble.

Calforisms: Little thoughts that, with a little nurturing, could grow up into big thoughts.

Gafforisms: Pithy blunders.
Halforisms: Sayings that are half-true. Perhaps includes all of the above.
For a few other words I thought up — this post will Googlewhack paragraphorisms and epitaphorisms — check out me-hoo, pollutrients, anaphones, and digestimating.