Basically, this website looks like a house. Maybe an old house, maybe a new one, maybe you get to pick. But everyone is free to go around and destroy stuff. Tip that vase over. Crash. Take a sledge hammer to the walls. Drive a car into the porch. Take a chainsaw to spiral staircase, watch Read More …
Now don’t get me wrong. I’m in support of writers getting what’s fair, and I hope the strike is settled soon. But, sorry, I can’t help myself, when I think of an idea. If TV shows have no NEW material, how about using OLD material? Seriously. Jay Leno could recycle old jokes. It’s not like Read More …
This probably exists. (Or doesn’t for reasons of rights or costs.) You dress up as your favorite classic TV character — Kramer, Ralph Cramden, Kojak, Lucy, Herman Munster, Marge Simpson, Erica Kane, whoever — and while a famous clip plays without that character on a background screen, you recite those famous lines, become the TV character. Call Read More …
Gees, what a loser of a show. Hello. The producers never found the humor of the premise (if there is one) and they totally forgot you cannot be funny (at least not in a popular, commercially viable way) with being obnoxious, offensive, politically correct and/or ridiculous. Sure, you can have “smart” Cavemen, but they also have to Read More …
“The use of the useless,” a Taoist philosopher once said. Ah, but there’s also the use of the stupid, and I don’t mean guys like dumb blondes and dumb friends they feel superior to. No, instead of looking for that logical finishing touch, how about adding something that makes no sense? (a) It’ll keep ’em guessing, and maybe they’ll Read More …
Or maybe it’s Big Brother: The Detox Edition. You corral a bunch of strung-out celebrities and resurrect their fading fame by helping them break their worst addictions. Or maybe it’s called Cold Turkey With the Stars. Could even serve as reminder to our youth: In America, you always get a second chance … as long as Read More …
Oops. Guess somebody already thought of this: The random excuse generator. And check this out: A blog devoted to generators. It links to all sorts of wild ones … including an idea generator … put your name on a plane … The Boobie Name Generator … Bart Simpson writing your sentence on a blackboard. At least I did think Read More …
Actually, that sounds like fantasy. But that’s not what I mean. No, flip the premise and see what you get: The Biggest Gainer Anorexics compete to put on the most weight. Wife Keep Producers scout for the most horrible wives and the men who want to leave them — then force the men to stay. Read More …
There’s something not funny about having comedy awards. Seriously. It’s old “hey, here’s a funny joke” problem: If you say something’s funny, well, the audience gets all, “Well, we’ll be the judge of that,” and the performers get all jokey and phoney. Or at least they seem to. So instead, have an awards that’s disguised Read More …
Nah, just kidding about the ice. But I could arenas shows packin’ ’em in, with police and fire re-enactments and other stunts. Hose fights! Cops & robbers re-enactments. Gun-safety tips. Good behavior messages. Then lots of life-saving, heart-pounding mayhem. Real fires? Real rescues? Famous arrests. Most Wanted rundown. Where do I get tickets?! If not real active cops and firemen, then Read More …
It’s only a matter of time. Technology advances. Star salaries keep rising. And legal rights expire. Then someone could re-animate in the most realistic way all the bygone stars. Greta Garbo. The Three Stooges. Write new material, and they’d “know” how to act it out. Nyuk-nyuk-nyuk. Max Headroom was only just a sniff of what’s Read More …
Every day, either (a) record horrible singing by a friend or family member, or (b) find some recording of horrible singing on Web. Call it scrreeech.com or screeech.com (with 3 e’s; url with correct spelling is taken). Could be a hoot! Could even do all sorts of distortion fun, by “photoshopping” familiar songs to insert Read More …
During the Live Earth concert, it was hard to take the trooping celebrities seriously. “I turn off lights!” “I drive a hybrid!” Today, after hearing more of this, I wondered how much of this really makes a difference. I half-expect to hear next: “I turn off a light before I blow-dry my hair for an hour!” Or: “On my Read More …
What if … you poked tiny holes in hot dogs so steam would vent in a way that the hot dog would turn itself as it heated? I was just about to try it, when I found out somebody ate the last two hot dogs! Test results await. More adventurous would be the Self-Turning Burger. Read More …
Lots of sites, like Netflix, try to predict from past behavior and preferences what you might like next. But, frankly, sometimes I’m just sick of the same old stuff and want some surprises. So, Netflix, if you had a “Change Up” or “Change of Pace” button, mining a category or genre I usually avoid, I’d click. Find Read More …